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It’s a good day to be a monster.


Winning the war on humans!



Now you know how the sausages are made,

in a safe place, during this most vulnerable of times,

Mother’s Day.


“Ladies and Gentlemen, the President of the United States of America.”




Historically, it’s a creepy holiday.

I’m having crepes.



Like taxes, bears, 2 for 1 sandwich deals, rocket bikes, pyroclastic flow


and death.

Happy Birthday JW!


“It’s okay to put ketchup on hot dogs.  No big deal.”

She told me to go over her math homework

and to use only pencils.

It’s my responsibility as a parent to attempt to unlock and awaken the primordial math beast that lurks sleeping deep within. My experiments thus far have unlocked beasts but not the right one, as of yet.

I am no longer allowed to go over math homework.

Is she shouting or laughing?

Perhaps both.

If you want to grow your baby’s head to three times its normal size in just a few short weeks and five easy payments.

The price DOES NOT include shipping, handling and/or method of shipment which will be selected and charged at the time of delivery.

From Beyond!

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